In a surprise twist, I re-learned the secrets of a serene spirit at a recent memorial service. I met with the family before, and they detailed a very difficult life for their mother Darlene. When just 16, a car accident not only killed the driver in her car, but injured her badly, including the loss of all her teeth. She married three times, and each husband died. Humorously, she wouldn’t marry her longtime boyfriend—she wanted to keep him alive. She lost a young son, one of the most difficult losses when your child dies young.
But their description of her also included a serene and happy spirit. She was fun to be around, joy filled her life, and she loved all. And her response to some very difficult experiences reminded me of the process of how God works.
“Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, 2 through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. 3 Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; 4 perseverance, character; and character, hope.”
That process begins with faith in Jesus as Savior and Lord. Faith brings us into peace with God, which gives us access to grace: receiving and giving unmerited favor. And seeing the glory of God gives us a reason to rejoice—from his presence in our lives, from verses 1 and 2. But according to verses 3 and 4, joy goes further into our souls because we can now rejoice when we face suffering. Think of Darlene in her response to suffering.
Here, we make a choice. Do we focus on the sorrow and loss and become bitter, or do we rely more on God’s grace and become better? Of course we don’t rejoice for the pain and loss that accompanies suffering, but for the process by which God works. His peace and grace in our lives allow us to trust (have faith) in God. The only way to gain perseverance (patience, or long suffering) is to face suffering and hang in there. Seems pretty obvious, doesn’t it? That teaches us we can endure the next attack.
How we respond to suffering determines our character: do we build a character that quits in hard times, or one that continues? And as we strengthen the character trait of perseverance, we find we can face more difficulties and still keep on keeping on.
And that engenders hope. Hope looks to the future, so when we don’t give in to loss, we build hope for the future that we can continue. But what if we give in? We build a character trait of quitting, which will wreak havoc on our entire lives.
Yes, there is a time to quit. WC Fields supposedly said, “Try, try again, then quit. No use being a damn fool about it.” But we quit, not because we can’t take it, but because it’s the wise and strong and godly act.
Of all people, followers of Jesus should win Olympic gold medals for joy and hope.
We don’t have to abandon our values because that seems like the only way to get through the problem, because we think that God is unable or willing to do what only He can do.
The secret of spiritual serenity? Hard times will reveal or build the character we wish to have. Bitter or better, we choose.
Kick Starting the Application
In reviewing the two responses to hard times, which is your default? How has that worked for you? What can you do, this week, to choose a better character? Will you?